Saturday, October 25, 2014

Scary Movie Month 2014, Day 25

Chopping Mall

Sorry to steal Patrick Bromley's thing here, but while I was warned that this one was awful, it wasn't. It was...fine. Those who are familiar with Patrick know precisely the tone of frustration mixed with resignation with which that "fine" should be said.

For an 80s movie directed by Jim Wynorski and featuring teens being hunted through a mall by laser-equipped killer robots, it still manages to feel utterly generic. Cameos by the likes of Paul Bartel, Mary Woronov, and Dick Miller are always welcome, but they don't do the movie any favors in the "I haven't seen this before" department.

The characters are the thinnest of cardboard, not even the sturdy corrugated stuff. I've already forgotten all their names, and I finished watching it maybe 10 minutes before I wrote this sentence. Still, it's not actively bad and there are a few fun moments (one very cheap head-explosion in particular made me laugh out loud) but it's not good either, and certainly not worthy of either great title (apparently "Chopping Mall" was the title once it hit video, the original title was the more generic but also more apt "Killbots"). Lastly, I've said it before and I'll say it again: stop wasting Gerrit Graham, movies! He's the best, and one scene ain't enough to enjoy it.

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